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BEWARE OF HIGH ELVES! Especially if you live in Oregon. 
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Killed by Khorne
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What we have always known to be true, and what we have been endeavouring to protect the Warhammer World and other adjacent reality systems from all these years:

THE MENACE OF THE HIGH ELVES

Quote:
The last thing the woman from Northeast Portland probably expected when she got up Tuesday morning was that she would be attacked by a sword-wielding elf.

But that's what happened around 7 a.m. as she drove her red BMW by the intersection of Southeast 7th and Morrison.

A man dressed in chain-mail with a helmet, shield and carrying a sword and staff ran into traffic and started attacking her car.

She called 911, reporting that "a pirate" was attacking her car.

When police got there, they detained Konrad Bass of Glendale, Oregon.

Bass told officers that he wasn't a pirate but a "high-elf engaged in battle with the evil Morgoth."

Morgoth is a character created by JRR Tolkien in a prequel to the Lord of the Rings stories. In the stories, he is the character from which all evil grew.

Bass, who was cited for criminal mischief and transported to Providence Hospital, also told officers he had taken LSD.

The woman's car had several puncture marks.

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Mon May 26, 2014 8:05 pm
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Corsair
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Oregon? They are getting closer to Nagg?

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Mon May 26, 2014 8:11 pm
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Malekith's Best Friend
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He actually thought he was Fingolfin? :lol:

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Mon May 26, 2014 9:21 pm
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Miscast into the Warp
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Well if you are going to be a Noldor, pick a damn cool one to be :)

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Mon May 26, 2014 9:35 pm
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Killed by Khorne
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Calisson wrote:
Oregon? They are getting closer to Nagg?


They must be trying to outflank us by using the tunnels of the Underway!

I also think this is a misinformation broadcast; I believe this fellow to be a Wood Elf rather than a High Elf.

Evidence?

1) The Worldroots (how else could he have gotten there?)

2)
Quote:
also told officers he had taken LSD.

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Wed May 28, 2014 7:38 pm
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Cold One Knight
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I will have to agree with TD on this. Living right across the river from Portland I can tell you that Oregon is the American home of the wood elves. lots of hippies dancing and doing drugs in the forests.


Wed May 28, 2014 8:07 pm
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Killed by Khorne
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Taijushue wrote:
I will have to agree with TD on this. Living right across the river from Portland I can tell you that Oregon is the American home of the wood elves. lots of hippies dancing and doing drugs in the forests.


!lol!

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Wed May 28, 2014 8:28 pm
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Malekith's Best Friend
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There's two problems with this whole affair.

1) The woman reported an attack by a 'pirate'. Obviously she thought the assailant was one of our noble Corsairs. Since it was indeed a High Elf the fair damsel was an idiot to make such an error. !lol!

2) Understanding the High Elf had ASF her car (the chariot he was assaulting) should have gotten impact hits and everyone know those go BEFORE ASF!

I find this story somewhat dubious. ;)

p.s. Rumor has it that Konrad Bass will be starring in Peter Jackson's next trilogy of films in his effort to milk the Tolkien World of everything he can. :lol:


Wed May 28, 2014 9:54 pm
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Killed by Khorne
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Gidean wrote:

p.s. Rumor has it that Konrad Bass will be starring in Peter Jackson's next trilogy of films in his effort to milk the Tolkien World of everything he can. :lol:


A Silmarillion trilogy, really? !lol!

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Wed May 28, 2014 10:52 pm
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Malekith's Best Friend
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T.D. wrote:
Gidean wrote:

p.s. Rumor has it that Konrad Bass will be starring in Peter Jackson's next trilogy of films in his effort to milk the Tolkien World of everything he can. :lol:


A Silmarillion trilogy, really? !lol!



The dude turned the single book of The Hobbit into a trilogy of movies! :roll:


Thu May 29, 2014 1:18 am
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Killed by Khorne
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True that. I'm quite looking forward to the third even with the "liberties" taken with the story :lol:

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Thu May 29, 2014 7:46 pm
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punctured the car? those wussy elves dont even drags 2handed?

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Thu May 29, 2014 8:05 pm
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Enkiel wrote:
punctured the car? those wussy elves dont even drags 2handed?


Must have been one of those shoddy Skaven-built contraptions... or possibly a Seeker chariot with a malfunctioning ward save.

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Thu May 29, 2014 10:14 pm
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