Funniest/most unreasonable deaths and kills

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Nightcall
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Post by Nightcall »

I had a battle with my Lizardmen vs a Nuln themed Empire army. Two Lizardmen Jungle Swarm took out a entire unit of Handgunners (I could just picture them trying to bat off the snakes and what-not, shouting "Ow, he bit me!"). Then when my opponent tried to shoot my Saurus Cold Ones, he misfired and blew himself up. Funny match, that... :)
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Demetrius
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Post by Demetrius »

Thought I would share this, the story of the CHARIOT OF DOOM! :lol:

But seriously, last week me and my friends played a 5 way 2000 point game. One of my single chariots charged an Ironblaster (ok it had 2 wounds left) and killed it. 140 points.

A couple turns later it charged a unit of 14 bulls with Firebelly and BSB in the unit. I kill an ogre (3 wounds), and he fails to wound me. I am on 6 from 3 wounds, rear and a charge, so he loses by two. Fails a rerollable 7 test and flees, a I catch him. From memory it was around 800 points.

Next turn I decided to charge a unit of 12 White Lions, to see if the Chariot of Doom could take any more VPs. It killed two WLs, and got smacked.

Still, about 950 points or so killed by my little 100 point chariot. I was happy :D
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Lord kalhadron
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Post by Lord kalhadron »

10 DE crossbowmen shooting at three minotaurs at long range (back in 6th ed), hitting on fives- 19 out on 20 hits! No wounds


In 40k: A deathwing squad of five decimates a ork shoota boy squad (3rd ed), only two orks armed with big shootas remains. They shoot back and kills them all! (six shots, hitting on fives, wounding on threes, and saving on 2+). Epic
Flash29
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Post by Flash29 »

more unreasonable then funny but still

11 cold one knights with unkillable dread(banner of hag greaff) ( 1+as PoK, CoC, dragonhelm, soulrender) and a 3 null talisman bsb. i get siren songed by a unit of 30 strong, non horde deployed deamonettes with a herald obviously
i take no wounds ( 3 got through but made my saves) althoug denying rerolls does help, i completely murder the unit and the herald for good measure. only 5 remain and i get soulblighted.

my opponent has a flank charge with his bloodthirster with re-rolls to hit and decides to charge me. So i clean up those remaining deamonettes and challange the bloodthirster with my lord. i save everything in the challange, but wiff my attacks. he loses 2 wounds to combat ress as the deamonettes are cleaned up. i reform, and static combat res him to death in another 2 rounds of combat as he can not damage me in the challenge.

on another note he did't have a tzeech unit, nor points for a disk so his death wielding tzeech herald was walking on his own. He survived 5 miscast only losing 1 spell(big deal still has 6 left) and a lvl, he also took about 10 wounds from the combined shooting of crossbowmen and shades which he all saved with his 4+ ward.

but tzeech is fikle and he got of fate of bunja twice and both times rolled a 3 on his 2d6.

also had some amazing parrys with my crossbowmen. 10 guy's killed a fiend and 7 bloodletters, and only took 2 wounds from a 10 man unit with a herald (his herald kils 2 1 got parry) his other bloodletters hit 6 and he proceeds to roll 6 1's.



on another note i threw 1 fireball, a chillwind, and about 60 crossbowbolts(hitting on 7's though) in a unit of 6 gutterrunners and only killed 4.
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Lostshadow
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Post by Lostshadow »

No so much a kill, but a funny death for my opponent.

Its was HE vs my DE, 1500pts.

HE gets first turn, his mage (level 4 lore of shadow) casts the withering on my corsairs. Rolls 6,6,6,6
The spells goes off irresistable and miscast.
He rolls on the miscast table. Double 1. Large blast template blows up 7 spearelves. Wizard rolls and is sucked into the void (instant death).
His spears then panic from the miscast and flee off the battlefield.
The archers next to them also fail their panic test, flee off the battlefield and the Leaving a unit of swordmasters and phoneix guard left to face a level 4 wizard, level 2 wizard and 2 units of 20 Xbows.
My opponent conceded defeat there on turn 1
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Tyrannus deathbringer
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Post by Tyrannus deathbringer »

Funniest WHFB kill:

A 2 v 2 game of Dark Elves/Skaven vs High Elves/Dwarves

...its the penultimate turn of the game. A Dwarf King of Unkillable Runic Armour Save is standing free in the middle of the board after destroying one of our units.

He moves into position for a rear charge into the last big combat of the game, one where our elites are just beating the enemy elites. Needless to say, the close combat beast that is the King will likely turn that combat, and the game, against us.

...but the Dwarf King is now standing directly in Line of Site of my Reaper Bolt Thrower. Our opponents scoff at the chances of it damaging their near-Invincible King.

My turn and I fire a single shot at the Dwarf King. Hits, wounds.

"Strength five, minus two save?" my opponents query.

"No armour save"

"WHAAAT!?"

"No armour save"

*cue frantic rules inquisition*

They eventually except they cant make a save. They try and console themselves over the fact he has 3 wounds remaining.

I roll a '5'. Dwarf King dead :) In the final turn his absence is decisive as we win the game :D

Honourable mentions: Using Shadowblade for the first time after his rules were released...on Teclis! Wahaaahhahahahhahahahhaahaha!

Funniest all-time kill:

A game of Necromunda.

My Cawdor gang is spreading out at the beginning of their mission.

I know my opponent has a genestealer in his ranks so I deliberately send my juve's throught the middle of the gameboard as I attempt to draw out the 'stealer and get a crossfire on it.

(My juve's are the future of my gang. But sacrifices have to be made in war.)

Perhaps overconfident, my opponent charges his genestealer out of the shadows at my lowly juve.

It is (WS7 S6 I7 4A) versus (WS2 BS2 I3 1A)!

My juve has a sword (parry) and a stub gun pistol with dum-dum bullets (S4).

I close my eyes as I roll my two dice vs his four.

I roll a double 6.

He rolls 1, 1, 1, 3.

I parry the 3.

Another 1. Quadruple fumble!

So he has 7 - 4 = 3

I have 2 + 2 = 4

I get one hit.

It's a wound!

It's a kill!!!

My juve not only survives but thrives! My opponent is in paroxysms of frustration!!!! The only mathematically possible way for me to win and it came off!

I could just mentally picture it all happening:

My juve, sword in hand, creeps nervously through the dark metallic corridors of the Hive. He's shaking, sweating, internally questioning the orders he has been given. But he continues on. He want to become a ganger. He wants to become a man! He wants to be worthy of purging the heretic...
The predator explodes from the shadows, a bestial grin on its alien face, anticipating fresh meat as it leaps through the air!!!!
Awestruck, my juve drops his sword. He closes his eyes in terror as the creature speeds through the air towards him, reflexively pulling out his stub pistol...
The beast catches its trailing foot on an unseen fine line of plasteel wire hanging between two decayed ceramite blocks, is tripped in mid-air...and crashes unseemly to the ground, jaw-first, stunned!
My juve, eyes still tightly shut, his weighty pistol not even raised off the ground, fires in panic...
BOOM!
...he awaits the inevitable deathblow...
...but none comes!
He opens his eyes. The carcass of the extraterrestrial horror lies at his feet. The dum-dum bullet had put a crater through its exoskeleton skull. Not even a tyranid-engineered monstrosity could survive without its grey matter!



Fittingly, my juve got promoted to a ganger and his stats boosted after the XP from that match!!!
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Post by Gastronauticon »

The current semi-official chaos dwarf list has a big monster called the Kdaai Destroyer which is quite a tough nut:

T6 and -1 to non-magic to-wound rolls, so no pin-cushioning
+4 ward
I5 so no sun/pit
6 magic & flaming attacks , turbofrenzy (+D3 attacks) and thunderstomp.
M9 so it is in combat by turn 2
...and more. All at the low low price of 340-isch points.

It is Unstable though so when my cheap peg master (186 pts) got the jump on it from the rear, uncannily causing two wounds on it with sword of might and recieving none in return (dragonbane gem ftw!), it popped! Needless to say, I was relieved since I had no other means of dealing with it.

Without its battering ram, the rest of the cd army crumbled quite fast after that.
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Cold73
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Post by Cold73 »

Hmm....first time i see this post...ah well...
Maybe this will give you something to laugh about.

Few months ago....battle against Empire.
My 25 Witch Elves charge through a forest.....making a dangerous terrain test i roll 18 - ones.....the seven remaining witch elves do reach the enemey line...but are easily defeated in the ensuing melee.
We still iuse the same forest...but that forest particular model of a forest will always remain a ' poisonous forest'
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Tyrannus deathbringer
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Post by Tyrannus deathbringer »

Cold73 wrote:i roll 18 - ones....


:lol:
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Lostshadow
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Post by Lostshadow »

I have another one to add.

Im fighting against phoneix guard and white lions with my witch elves and black guard.

I manage to kill all the white lions leaving only one.
After all other attacks combat is a draw, we remember then that the white lion guy didnt attack so we do that attack, the white lion hits, wounds and kills a black guard, I lose by 1, the witch elves hold, the black guard fail their LD test, BSB re rolls they fail again, they flee, they run 3" and the single white lion banner elf runs down 13 black guard.......

There was also the time when I took down a treeman with 5 crossbowmen,......
Treeman charges, causes no wounds, I cause 2 wounds back, fails stubborn LD test, flees and the Xbow elves drag him to the ground and.........strangle him with thier bow strings?????
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Red...
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Post by Red... »

Yeah, the 18 ones had me laughing too. Oh wow, what appaulling bad luck :D

Treeman charges, causes no wounds, I cause 2 wounds back, fails stubborn LD test, flees and the Xbow elves drag him to the ground and.........strangle him with thier bow strings?????


Flip him over and put a bolt up his rear I suspect ;)
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Post by Seraphkast »

I was playing my VC in a tournament recently. Tough fight against O&G, he had 2 100 man gobbo units, a deathstar of Savage Orc Bigguns, some archers, mangler squigs, and a spear unit holding his BSB and L4 gobbo wizard. It'd been tough, but I'd actually broken one block of goblins, kept his orcs out of the fight, had an objective wrapped up, and suddenly, I got a line on his wizard. My tooled up Vamp Lord, made to be nigh unkillable (all sorts of the Ld shenanigans, Beguile, Night Shroud, 4+ Ward) charges with my unit of skellies. Roll in, get ready to swing, and out pops a skulker. Well, ASL manages to get rid of ASF....but I have a GW against his I2, so he swings first. Fails his Ld so he has to reroll, and is hitting on 5's. 3 hits. Rolls to wound, gets a 6 for Killing Blow. Vamp fails his ward and croaks!

Most Heroic Goblin, ever.
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Post by Mrdark12 »

Best kill I ever got was my Black Guard (Only 10 left from 20) challenged, my opponent feeling confident and accepted with his mounted High Elf Prince. He rolled to hit...and missed all three, he then got his ASF re-rolls...and missed all three.
My BG champ attacked and missed all three, hate re-rolls hit all three...wounded all three...he failed his Armour saves and ward saves and his Prince died, my BG unit then proceeded to kill 4 DPs and I lose 4 BG, BG won combat and over ran a unit of 10 dragon prices....best combat ever.
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Post by Zantesuke »

I once played a game with skaven (previous book) vs empire!
My warplightning cannon misfires and shoots in a random direction at max s and range.
It go's throug my slaves and hits the elector count in a unit halbardiers, it fails the lookout sir roll
and his ward save and gets 3 wounds.

That was a shot in the first turn! That was funn
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Post by Flash29 »

in the annual club champioenschip(spanning about 8 games) i'm facing teclis in the quarter finale with my fluffy witch elf list. (50 witches 30 executioners, some harpies a cauldron, hellebron and a hydra banner bsb) needless to say, things went bad. he had 2 hordes of white lions and 2 units of 20 archers and some spears and such and such

last turn all i have left is 10 witch elves with bsb, hellebron got killed.

so this unit is hiding in a forrest preserving those last points and getting cover as 1 unit of 20 wheels around and fires vrom 20+" at my witches
now thats move long range and fireing, so thats hitting on 5's wounding on 4's.

of the 20 shots he hits 11 and wounds 10. my bsb with 1 wound was left standing alone in a forest.


other game i'm running greenskins, focus on monsters in a large siege battle.

his cannon fires first turn at my giant and misfires, blowing himself skyhigh.

the giant eventually dies but falls on a diffrent warmachine killing it.

my spider however is superresistant. it makes its way to the hearth of the city, so far it had eaten 3 units of huntsmen and the goblins on top sniped out a engineer from a hellblaste as it was making its way to the objective. as the game is ending they decide they'd rather not end with a gigantic arachnarok in their city. first 2 helblasters rip lose doing a amazing 4 wounds, all seems lost as i boast i still have 4 left. i wasn't counting on 'them' 10 handgunners, hitting on 5's, hitting all and wounding 5 (on 6's) and i only make one save (on a 6ç

it dies, as it wast a finished model, (still doing howda and base. i took the spider of his base at put it on its back legs crawled up in the middle of their city.
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Post by Taijushue »

Maybe not the funniest but one of my most memorable kills was against my buddys tomb kings.

I get first turn my unit of shades with assassin move in close on his flanks then magic phase assassin gets steed of shadows and flies right next to his heirophant on steed that he foolishly had hidden behind his army by himself.

assassin throws stars and cutting the legs out from under the skeleton horse and leaving the heirophant in a pile of broken bones on the sand.

fastest win i've ever had
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Post by Vulcan »

From last night's game.

My DE tournament list vs. an Imperial Knight list

My list is speed bump heavy heavy, with a unit of corsairs to do the heavy lifting in combat, a big(ish) unit of RXBs, and two units of 10 witches as tire strips (like speed bumps, but they'll shred the tires of whatever runs them over). His list's prominent feature is a deathstar of IC cavalry with BSB, general, priest, spare captain, and caster.

Over the course of the game he charges the priest and spare captain out to chase off some harpies, he burns his dispel scroll early, and one of my Witch units gets a flank charge in on the deathstar.

I then roll an 11 on the winds of magic and go to town, pushing through Enfeebling Foe, Withering (mainly getting him to burn his dispel dice), and Mindrazor onto that combat.

The witches muder the general and BSB (he made way to preserve the unit), the two flankers fail to do any wounds in return, I win by 5-6. Sure, he holds on steadfast 9, but next round the witches still swing first and will deliver 24 S8 attacks onto the unit, and my corsairs and the OTHER unit of 10 Witches is still waiting in the wings, so my opponent calls it there.
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Post by Lorddrittz »

Well the corpse cart from Hell.

I charged a unit of Harpies into the flank of a corpse cart and I failed my fear test failing to wound it.

The corpse cart killed 3 harpies defeated them ran them down and overran into a second unit of harpies.

The second unit of Harpies was also defeated and run down.

The 2 units of Harpies units were my only casualties for the Battle, but it was a hilarious set of combats.
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Post by Mindslaver »

A unit of 20 night goblins released 3 fanatics as I was to charge them. I stopped however but no fanatic got into my unit of marauders, which were charging. The following turn, he failed his annimosity test for the goblins and they had to charge me, so he ran into his fanatics! Every goblin in the unit died from the last fanatic and in addition, he had cleared the battlefield of fanatics ^^
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Post by Ragian Cain »

Threadromancy here.

Assassin killed by Goblin Bolt Thrower crew :(
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Post by Ataroth »

I had the other week with my Tomb Kings. Was playing a very nasty Slanesshi themed Daemons army to which I go slaughtered. There was, however, on minor victory for me. In turn 2 he preceded to charge my 20 unit of Archers with both the Masque (epp) and the Keeper of Secrets (double epp). After nerfing my Archers even harder with Leadership based spells of doom, the combat phase begins. I weather the torrential abuse from the Slanesshi and feebly try to attack back. This is when I find out that to even target the Keeper I need to pass a Ld check... on snake eyes. 1 archer makes it. He then needs to hit on a 5. He does. He then needs to wound on 6. Would you adam and eve it, he does. Then the Keepers ward save which is failed! Yes a measly 6 point TK Archer managed to knock a wound off the Keeper. It was a small victory, but it made me smile nonetheless.
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Post by Red... »

In a game of 3k game dark elves versus dark elves this evening, the following occured:

My Chariot charged my opponent's hydra. I rolled a 6 for impact hits and manage to do a total of 2 wounds. He does 1 back on me, and then passes his leadership test. On his turn, I knock another wound off him, and he does none back on me. I win combat by 1 and he rolls a 10. I chase him down and slay the hydra. My pursuit roll runs the chariot into a bunch of trees. I roll a one, followed by a six. The chariot promptly explodes:

"Wahoo we killed the hydra! Wahoo we killed...wait, what's that behind it, it looks like a gigantic tr...."*sound of shattering wood, metal and dark elf bodies*

A few turns later one of my other chariots flees from a dragon, runs into another set of trees. He rolls a 6 and so is fine. In his following turn, he rolls a 1, followed by a 2 and as he has already taken two wounds, he explodes as well.

Earlier in the game, I did a combi charge with a unit of six cold one knights and a chariot against his bus of 8 CoKs with both a Master and a BSB with Hydra Banner in it. The Cold One Knights fail their charge (putting them in the way for my RxBs to be able to shoot at his Dark Riders) while the chariot makes it into combat:

Me: "Well, at least it passed his stupidity test"
Opponent: "Really? Look at who it just charged all by himself...I'm not so sure it passed it after all..."
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Post by Druchiishootlord »

A few years ago I charge my Dread Lord into some DE Warriors. My friend reveals an Assassin. This particular Assassin knew the Dance of Doom, Rune of Khaine, and Hand of Khaine who happened to have an extra dagger on him. I was fielding the Unkillable Lord plus his Dragon.

I get challenged by this Assassin. He rolls to see how murderous he is and gets an additional 3 attacks. So with 7 attacks he hits with all of them directed against my dragon. He also wounds with all of them. I go on to pass exactly 1 save. Dead Dragon. My Lord goes on to whiff his attacks and snake eyes his break test. After surviving a another hail of 7 attacks with no wounds I whiff out again and stick. My next charge puts both Hydras into this spear unit. The spear unit is wiped out to the man and...our Assassin is on all kinds of crack dealing our 7 more hits that bounce off me as I can't seem to hit him once.

Assassin breaks, escapes me and proceeds to slaughter a Master and a unit of 6 CoK before the game ends.

Next game I play against my friend about 4 hours later ends with his assassin finally dying...after he killed my dragon a 2nd time in one round of combat.
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Post by Samusin »

hmm...
my first game HE vs Skaven (me playing the HE) all my HE ran of field in the 3rd turn... guess they where scared of rats XD

but the funnyest game I had... -.- well it wasn't that funny for me... but for my 2nd game I did quite okay :P
I played chaosdwarves vs magic-heavy wood elves (lol didn't even know they could hurt so much with their shitty lore)...
I don't realy remember what list I played.. but I had 3 wizards I remember (a lvl1 special character lol didn't pick him cuz of his magic :P was just a bonus, then a lvl2 and a lvl4) and I had a deamonic engine.. and a block of 30 warriors/spearmen whatever they where called.. and some special troops.. dont realy recall what they where...
my enemy played allso 3 mages many tree-dudes and the put up that orion overkill character...

1st turn, my deamonic engine misfires and forces all wizards a miscast and them losing wizard lvl and spells etc lol I ended up with 2 wizards without spells and magic lvl and a lvl0 wizard with 1 spell xD then in the magic phase he suffered a miscast (why not^^) and got sucked into warp destroying the special troop he was with allmost entirely so I ended up with a out of controll deamonic angine, no wizards, still the warriors and a few specialchoice dudes... he still not a single wound or anything -.- epic fail
then after 2 turns I still got the same stuff left (his shoting failed at everything.. his magic didn't cause me harm... but it had some umplesant outcomes so I couldn't realy do anything but standing back hoping to have one of his units charging the wrong of my units...
then 4th turn my deamonic engine got killed by a group of 10 core-archers haha I didn't do a single wound to them again -.-
orion charged my core warriors and 2 units gladeriders charged my special force... I was like "oh right just masacre me"
but then the combats turned realy quick^^
the first unit of glade riders got killed directly first turn of combat. his other riders still stood there and kept crippeling my special troops.. next turn my specialchoice killed them entirely just to get charged by tree-dudes and get killed ;) to bad
but orion vs 30 cheap warriors.. orion didn't cause any wounds, warriors killed him in 2 turns :P bye 575 points XD´

at the end I lost still by 500+ points :(
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Post by Killerk »

Thread necromancy.

I was looking over the DRIACH, and saw this old thread, then I remembered the tournament 2 weeks ago. I was getting butchered by deamons, my only hope to get points back, was to pop the blood thirster. As I had no fighting characters in the army. So I decide to charge my supreme sorc (with pendant) in to his flank, hopefully save any KB's. in the daemon phase overrun from a unit of furies with my CoK, in to him, and crush him with static combat, rank, charge, flank, banner + bsb, in my turn. to get some point's.
The sorc goes in, saves all wound's including KB's. She actually hit's and wounds the thirster :shock: (need 5+ to hit, 6+ to wound, he fails his 3+ save and 5+ ward) Next my peg does absolutely nothing. I win combat, charge, flank + 1W. My opponent rolls for his instability, and poof goes the Bloodthirster. His bsb was 13" away, trying to pursuit what was left of my exes.
:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:

we counted the combat about 10 times in between laughing spree's.
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