Aaargh! Stop dying, you imbeciles!

Sulla · Post by **Sulla** » Thu Aug 23, 2007 7:38 pm

Typical minions... useless, incompetent, bumbling excuses for Elves.

Do any of you have the same problems as me? Your General performs outstandingly, doing exactly what you wanted them to, but whenever he or she turns their back, the rest of the army goes to pieces...

Last battle i played was vs woodies. My high sorceress flew around on her manticore wiping up small enemies soaking up a little missile fire but not really worrying about it due to a combination of soulstealer and a ward save, but the other morons couldn't fight to save themselves. My missile troops were outshot by archers, my dark riders refused to charge anything that looked remotely scary, despite passing terror tests for his dragon lord early in the game, and despite same dragon haviong a highborn with only 1 wound left in their charge arc for at least 3 seperate charges and dryads for 2... My 'bait and charge' knights with the hydra banner and soul shadows std killed one unit of dryads but then pursued 6" to put them exactly 1 inch in front of his wild riders. Luckily a reroll on the break test held them long enough for the sorceress to pull their fat out of the fire but when the survivors tried the same trick on the next unit of dryads, they rewarded me with a stupidity test before they could charge and then proceded to die to a dragon's breath and a single bowshot. I even took an assassin since i wouldn't be faced by any heavy knights with 5 attacks could only net 1 wound vs the highborn with no ward save on dragon and his witchelves were routed in a single round.

I am so sick of the general incompetence of my minions and lackeys... I should be able to execute some of them before the battle to give some backbone to the rest... :twisted:

Pathetic weaklings.

Roman v. numeral · Post by **Roman v. numeral** » Thu Aug 23, 2007 7:57 pm

Your subject line is very funny. Unfortunetly I have the same problems with my troops, and it's not very funny at all.

Murmandamus · Post by **Murmandamus** » Thu Aug 23, 2007 9:09 pm

oh yes i know such pain. Especialu when mr dragonlord obliterate enemy units and puny warriors flee from panic because dark riders fleed from charge to enable warriors to countercharge. Weaklings...
Or when stupid ghouls kill my soliders. Hey foul things i am only one allowed to kill them hands off you scavengers.

Carl weathers · Post by **Carl weathers** » Thu Aug 23, 2007 9:14 pm

Same thing with me. The worst is when the stuffing falls out of my warrior blocks when all theyre fighting is human foot soldiers. My officers always perform, so it must just be the curse of Evil Warlords everywhere.

Raneth · Post by **Raneth** » Thu Aug 23, 2007 10:25 pm

Sulla, as is often the case, I share your frustration. Hence, my last list features BG and a BSB. These guys die all the same - but at least they die doing their job.

Morvai · Post by **Morvai** » Thu Aug 23, 2007 11:52 pm

I’m standing exactly opposite of you. My troops always do their work, they are totally reliable and get the job done perfectly. However my general is always dieing on me. Armoursave, Wardsave, Gauntlet of power, it doesn’t matter, he dies. And to make matters worse he dies before doing his job!
Now I have found a solution for my problem, and although it would probably not help you much I would like to share it.

I have turned my Lord and Hero in kamikaze fighters. My lord rushes to his dead (with all his fancy equipment) and drags as much with him as he can. My hero in the mean time gathers all the arrow fire (which he has never died from!) and generally threatens everything in sight.
Thanks to this tactic my troops have all the time and opportunity in the world to finish of the opposing army.

I know it doesn’t help you much, but it does show you nicely that sometimes drastic times ask for drastic actions.

Irtehdar · Post by **Irtehdar** » Fri Aug 24, 2007 4:43 pm

I wouldnt bother too much with the pathetic minions who die as soon as you look away. They will not make that mistake more than once seing as theyre... you know... dead.

Druchii has a drawback. Toughness 3 hurts.
Our big stuff is subject to stupidity, frenzy, idiotism, toughness 3 and smells like cold one poo...

Darthken · Post by **Darthken** » Fri Aug 24, 2007 11:04 pm

i seem to have a mixed bag of games.
depending on how much i sacrifice to the dice gods befor the game.
ill have games where my characters will do everything i ask of them but my troops 'bah'.
and then next week the troops will excel themselves and the generl/sorceress/noble die in the most humiliating ways.
just once id love to have a game were everything meshed together

Irtehdar · Post by **Irtehdar** » Fri Aug 24, 2007 11:31 pm

Theres nothing more beautiful than when the dice god(Khaine) pulls through and decides to help out.
Mind this was back in my days as a Shaman of Tchar(Norse for Tzeentch)
Went all out on Marauders and DoW cannons. only 2 sets of chaos armour in the entire 3k army(a lvl 4 and a lvl 2 sorc)
That battle have in my gaming group maintained the record for ''Most 6's rolled in one game'' and also ''Most 1's rolled in one game'' for over 5 years so far.
All i can say is: ''Sacrafice more to the dice god'' :twisted:

Darthken · Post by **Darthken** » Fri Aug 24, 2007 11:47 pm

OT i sacrifie plenty to the dice gods but after using my 1st and 2nd born, the family pet, parents, grandparents,brother, sister, nieces and nephew's my list of sacrifices is growing thin :twisted:

Demetrius · Post by **Demetrius** » Sat Aug 25, 2007 1:51 am

Meh my whole armies not as good as it should be. Need better units me think.

Heros cant roll a 2+ armour save to save his life.
Troops cant get enough wounds in to break a unit, then fails LD and gets run down...
Hydras- huge 5 headed monsters, supposedly unstoppable killing machines, cant kill more than one freakin brettonian peasant, then fails LD and gets run down by peasants...
Cold ones cant pass stupidity when they want to charge in crucial times... every other time they are fine though.
Shades... lets say they are becoming usless

Yeah they are my problems... o well ill keep trying lol

Ranieth · Post by **Ranieth** » Sat Aug 25, 2007 12:41 pm

My army always seems to perform at least decent, most of the time at least. There's times when corsairs stand fast when combo charged by ogres in the front and pistoliers in the rear, and other times when a crossbowman unit harbouring my general runs off the board after 3 dead comrades.

All in all I am probably free from the typical evil warlord-syndrome of worthless underlings - I am clearly not evil enough. That will have to be taken care of.

Vogon · Post by **Vogon** » Sat Aug 25, 2007 3:25 pm

I've got to say that I too have trouble with keeping my troops in the fight. I mostly use them as speed bumps till I can get my heavy hitters into play. Having a large number of t4 armies around here and only s3 on most attacks I struggle to do wounds. Having said that i also can't roll armour saves for toffee

Recently though I seem to have been doing pretty well with my CoS army that's fun

Fingol darkwater · Post by **Fingol darkwater** » Sat Aug 25, 2007 4:10 pm

I stopped using Cold One Knights a long time ago, so my troops have always been very reliable.

Shadow dark · Post by **Shadow dark** » Sat Aug 25, 2007 4:22 pm

I go into a game expecting everyone in my Dark Elves to die in a very humiliating way (i didn't start off like this, but if it weren't for the fact that every time i accuse them of it they roll a one, i'd swear my opponents dice were weighted.

My cold one knights are the one exception to the rule, as they have in their career held the charge of a unit of Tomb King Chariots (Banner of Murder, needed 3 inches extra, rolled a 2), and Dwarf Warriors (with help from the anvil of Doom). I have however, given up on the harpies, as they will have to make at least one leadership during the game, which they will fail and leg it off the board.

Darthken · Post by **Darthken** » Sat Aug 25, 2007 9:24 pm

in the words of lord Farquard " some of you may die, but it is a sacrifice i am willing to make."
So as long as my general is still alive at the end of the game whether i win of lose, in my mind it is still a victory to me :lol:

D'haroth · Post by **D'haroth** » Sat Aug 25, 2007 9:36 pm

Very Druchii attitude darthken! If they fail then the soldiers were weak and deserved to die.

Seriously tho, the relative difficulty of playing the Druchii is part of the appeal isnt it? I never have had a close battle. Massacre one way or the other every time. It is also why you dont see as many Druchii forces as some of the more popular armies.

I suspect 2 reasons.
1. Its a dice game, sometime chance is on your side, sometimes it isnt.
2. S3 T3 elves are fairly weak and rely much more on strategy than brute force to win battles. The best strategy can be defeated by a single unlucky dice roll at the wrong time.

Die go · Post by **Die go** » Sat Aug 25, 2007 9:54 pm

Sad but true.

Darthken · Post by **Darthken** » Sat Aug 25, 2007 10:12 pm

ive had plenty of close battles and been massacred quite a few times.
the best win i can remember having however is a solid victory against O&G.
i find that even if nearly all my troops die but my characters, reapers and CoB are still alive at the end of the game i hover around minor victory/loss area.

Tokijin · Post by **Tokijin** » Sun Aug 26, 2007 7:34 am

Tactics, my friend, tactics.

I find that as long as I'm not playing like a trained Cold One, I'm usually in a position to move the game in a direction I want to go.

Sometimes the dice poop all over the best laid plans of mice, but I gaurantee that without the best laid plans of mice, the dice will definitely poop on you.

That said, I find that everything in the army is reliable to one degree or another, it's a matter of making it work. Try to play some more games against Wooodies so you can get a feel for how to best play against them.

Mr. anderson · Post by **Mr. anderson** » Sun Aug 26, 2007 9:20 am

tactics don´t always help: i had 10 CoKs running away from 20 nightgoblins :oops:

or my 20 execs failing against marauders.
the worst thing was when one fleeing chariot ran through my entire battle line and left few things more than spaghetti (pretty red spaghetti) behind it. after its triumphal run it ended in a big wall which jump aside when it was coming....

CRUNCH!!!

well, they deserved it. :twisted:

HUZZAH!

Kormin sombracier · Post by **Kormin sombracier** » Mon Aug 27, 2007 2:13 pm

I have exactly the same problem with WE :cry:

Do someone know a good article about beating WE ?

Ulric darksoul · Post by **Ulric darksoul** » Mon Aug 27, 2007 2:40 pm

Tokijin wrote:That said, I find that everything in the army is reliable to one degree or another, it's a matter of making it work.

sorry, but, the only thing that CoK are reliable to do is to go stupid in the worst moment in the battle...

Scactha · Post by **Scactha** » Mon Aug 27, 2007 5:26 pm

Carl Weathers wrote:/.../it must just be the curse of Evil Warlords everywhere.

That is just hilarious. :lol:

I can see a gathering of Chaos Lords, Druchii Highborn, Necromancers, Vampires etc. before me with them swapping sad tales about the ineptitude of their underlings.

Ranieth · Post by **Ranieth** » Mon Aug 27, 2007 5:32 pm

scactha wrote:
Carl Weathers wrote:/.../it must just be the curse of Evil Warlords everywhere.

That is just hilarious. I can see a gathering of Chaos Lords, Druchii Highborn, Necromancers, Vampires etc. before me with them swapping sad tales about the ineptitude of their underlings.

I take it your invitation was misplaced this year?

It seems that it's not only the bad guys who suffer from this syndrome though. One of my regular opponents play Empire, and I have yet to see his troops perform above average. Yes, average at best, and most of the time below average.